


Lemon Scented Candles

by mooyuip



Category: Marvel
Genre: Aged Up, Cute, Domestic, Fluff, Im scared, M/M, aka no pedos here, but im not a writer sorry, wanna try my best to get their characters accurate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:36:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29648658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mooyuip/pseuds/mooyuip
Summary: peter parker remembers the way he and wade had met one morning. what a mess.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Kudos: 14





	Lemon Scented Candles

**Author's Note:**

> they’re aged up (above 21). wade’s still older than peter.
> 
> also, to clear confusion, im writing peter parker from the ps4 game because thats the version i like best LOL

Lemon scented candles and laundry. That’s what morning smelled like to Peter Parker. Candles, fresh laundry, polaroids- oh and Deadpool.

Wade still had his eyes closed. Peter raised a finger and gave the poor guy’s eye a soft poke. Wade snorted, and fell back into his loud snores.

It was 7am. Probably the latest he’s woken up in a while. Most days started at 1-3 am for the superhero. New York never slept, after all.

Wade was completely against the hero’s schedule, even after having discussed it.

Peter remembers the early parts of their relationship. God, how long ago was it? Three? Four years? He felt a twinge of guilt, but time wasn’t either of their strong suits. He’d just check one of Wade’s poorly drawn anniversary cards.

He still worked with Dr. Otto, then. The prosthetics consumed his entire life. Er- his Peter Parker life. Peter wanted to make a difference. He’d owed it not only to Ben and May, but to Otto himself. He was a sweet and intelligent fellow. Peter adored him.

During this time, Wade had dropped by New York for a job. “Killing off someone for doing something, somewhere” is how he described it. Definitely wasn’t the worst monster he’d been paid to exterminate, so he didn’t give the time much thought. Just another bug to kill off.

One night, however, the opposites had bumped into each other.

“What a shit show!” Deadpool wiped the human trafficker’s blood off his mask. He breathed, waiting to finally get to actually relax in the bar instead of a dank alley way, but was met with a not-so-foriegn-but-definetly-from-a-foriegn-place-downstairs smell. “Eugh, literally.”

He’d decided, last minute, to leave a little fun thing for the police to find as a gift for not arresting the guy before. Arranging the dead body into the shape of a huge dick, he heard the click of a gun’s safety being flicked off and the loud bang of a gun. A bullet pierced the right side of his chest.

“Geez, I don’t think that’s big enough for this cock.” Deadpool gestured toward the corpses arrangement. 

“But, hey,” He loads his gun and aims at the remaining man’s head. “Size doesn’t matter!” 

Deadpool could have sworn he pulled the trigger, so he was genuinely surprised to see the guy still shaking in fear and definitely still alive in front of him.

“Oh, geez, don’t tell me you’re like me too. Do you want to lay down and talk it out?”

“Uh,” a young boy’s voice interjects from a wall. The two men peer up. “that seems a bit uncomfortable. Where’d he lie down?”

Oh. “Spiderman...” Deadpool trails off. “Spiderman! You have the balls to kill the guy yourself? Do spiders even have balls?”

Peter coughs, before hopping down and webbing the other criminal to the ground. He observes Deadpool for a bit, and peers behind him to see Wade’s “work of art”.

Spiderman sighs. “You can’t just drop into my city impromptu and start making penises out of dead bodies.”

“And why not?” Deadpool gasps. “ It’s my form of expression, so please show some respect!”

Spiderman frowns. He knew Deadpool and his methods very well. It never crossed his mind that he would have to deal with his violent tendencies, though.

“Again, you can’t. It’s murder. It’s... wrong!” Peter says, a bit more passionately than Deadpool would have liked.

“Wrong? These guys have traumatized dozens of young girls and boys. And you’re defending them?” Deadpool says, a bit ticked off.

He wanted to keep a bit more patience with the guy. He was the youngest of the supers. And the most idealistic, but that’s partly what pissed him off the most.

Peter feels his ears redden. “Defend? I’m not defending them. But you don’t get to decide who dies or not.”

“My god complex says otherwise!” Deadpool says, kicking a corpse aside and walking closer to the red little man. “Look, why don’t you take you and your little arachnid pride and skedaddle? Why don’t you stop an actual crime?”

“This is an actual crime.” Spiderman insists, taking a bold step toward Wade. “Why don’t you skedaddle? Or, uh, actually don’t, I mean. Like, stay here because... I need to... arrest you.”

Deadpool gives the boy a pat on the head. “Nice one, kid. Well, anyways I’d rather take you up on the former option. Cya round?”

Deadpool turns to run out the alley way, but Spiderman shoots a web onto Wade’s back and drags the run-away back toward him and web shoots him against a wall. Deadpool attempts to squirm, but the webs are surprisingly strong. “You must watch freakier stuff than I do, bug boy.”

“Spiderman.” Peter says, huffing. “I’m Spider. Man. Man! And not a bug, an arachnid! Eight legs!” He rambles, obviously conflicted.

Peter continues, “Please, stop talking! And making weird jokes! Totally messes with my Boy Next Door image.”

“Uh-“

“And the genital? Out of corpses? Really? What am I even supposed to say? I’m a friendly neighborhood spider man. Friendly!” Peter rambles on, before glancing at Deadpool.

“Jesus. Thank god I’m not a hero. I can’t imagine saying genital instead of dick.” Deadpool quips, before spider man shoots a web on his mouth.

“God, forget this happened. And stop “stopping crime”, please? That’s sorta my job.” Peter asks, while rearranging the corpses into a proper pile.

Deadpool gives him two thumbs up and a grin. 

Spiderman sighs and zips out of the alley. “Can’t wait for the memory to be completely repressed.”


End file.
